Receiving While Giving

As a pastor I often find myself thinking I will be the one who will "minister to" or "bless" others and sometimes the tables get turned. I had one of those moments today when I thought I was going to bless someone and in return I was the one blessed and ministered to.

This past Sunday a dear woman at our church came up to me after the service and asked if I would come to visit her husband who is suffering from Alzheimer's and celebrate communion with them

We set a time for Monday morning and I grabbed the portable communion set and drove over to the nursing home and spent some time with them. When I first arrived he was lucid so we celebrated communion together right away to take advantage of the moments we had with him. After we were done she asked if I would walk with them to his room because she had something she wanted to show me. 

She shared about how she was praying for her husband the she said, "The Lord spoke to me and told me to get a ball for him. All I could think of was a basketball but at the grocery store I saw a bin of large balls and there was nice blue one that would match his room. So I bought it." She then proceeded to sit across from her husband and they bounce the ball back and forth her eyes lighting up as they did it. After they finished she set the ball down and told me that she hasn't shown that to anyone except the nurses.

We talked for awhile and then she grabbed a picture from the dresser and showed it to me. It was of them celebrating their 40th anniversary on a Norwegian cruise. I marveled at how different he looked. The man in the picture was vibrant and had a sparkle in his eyes. You could tell that he was enjoying the moment with his wife. This same man was now sitting in a chair with a blank look on his face and didn't even know we were in the room with him. After she set the picture down this is what she said to me.

"Pastor Todd, last week was our 48th anniversary and I was sitting in my living room crying because we weren't able to celebrate it together. Then the Lord spoke to me and said, 'You have had 48 wonderful years together. 48! Remember the good times and the memories you have had.' I started thinking about the adventures we have had; four cruises in Norway, trips to Branson and other trips. We have had so many wonderful times and 48 wonderful years. I realized I needed to stop crying and start rejoicing. So I did and I said to myself, 'This is the day that the Lord has made I will rejoice and be glad in it." 

I have found myself in and out of some personal pity parties over the past few weeks because of a difficult situation I have been going through and today I realized God was saying to me, "Todd, I didn't have her ask you to visit so you could bless them but so that you would realize that you need to rejoice because this is the day I have made."

It's amazing how we can so often think we are going to give something to someone else when God turns it upside down and we realize we are the ones receiving.

Thank you my dear sister and brother for being the ones to minister to me.

The Blessing of Unity

"Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity! It is like the precious oil on the head, running down on the beard, on the beard of Aaron, running down on the collar of his robes! It is like the dew of Hermon, which falls on the mountains of Zion! For there the Lord has commanded the blessing, life forevermore." Psalm 133

Today is day that I wish I could fast forward through and arrive at tomorrow morning. It is a day I wish I didn't have to be in the office and could just hide somewhere. Today is the day that our elder board will stand before the congregation and ask them to vote for my dismissal. Yes, you read that correctly. They are asking for me to be terminated as a pastor at our church. 

I have known this day is coming for a little over a month and I am still having a hard time wrapping my brain around it. I didn't do anything immoral or unbiblical. There was no affair or addiction. It is simply because I don't have the administrative skill set and leadership style they feel is needed. I struggle with this and believe they are making a mistake. I could go into the reasons why I feel that way but it would not be appropriate so I won't.

So here is the deal. I believe they are making a wrong decision and me and my family will suffer because of this decision yet...I still love these men and am willing to stand next to them in ministry until my final day here arrives. Why is this?

You see, unity doesn't mean we always agree, it means that we will love each other well and stay committed to each other even in the midst of that disagreement. We will seek restoration when we feel we were wronged and we will not allow Satan to get his grimy hands on this precious bride of Christ, the Church, and drive wedges of discord and anger between us. 

My biggest prayer for this meeting tonight is that even though there will be disagreement, and there will be plenty, there will be love and commitment and above all else, unity.

"Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of god in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 3:12-14

What an awesome passage written by the Apostle Paul. It is such a great reminder for every person who is a child of God no matter how long they have been following Him. I think is a passage that every believer should read every single day to remind them of one important fact. NOBODY HAS ARRIVED YET!

I am trying to remind myself of this daily. Why? Because I am going through a difficult time in which I feel that some people very close to me have wronged me. I find myself talking to myself while I am driving around town or outside working saying things like, "I would never do what they are doing!" or "They are going to have to answer to God on this one someday and I hope he nails them!" Things they have said to me have cut me deeply and even caused me to doubt myself. I feel like they are spinning things to try to keep everything in control and I am being asked to be quiet and take it for the sake of unity. So......I must stop and remind myself that I have not arrived where Christ wants me to be nor have they. So even if some of what I feel is true I must love them well even if I disagree with them and I must remember that they have not arrived where Christ wants them. 

Imagine what could happen in a church if everybody had that same mindset. What a powerful witness that would be. A church that is ever mindful that they are in a process called sanctification. A process that is continual and will never be complete until Christ calls us to be with him. A process in which we stumble and bumble our way trying to honor God knowing that we will fail and fall yet knowing that there is grace with each other to keep at it.

So here are the words I give to myself and I hope whoever reads this will do likewise: "I am not yet perfect but I am striving to experience the power that raised Christ from the dead in my own life so I will become more like him every single day. Oh, by the way, the others around me are doing the same to cut 'em some slack."

Shalom