Choosing the Better Part

So here I am sitting in my office that is way too cluttered, and I am contemplating my schedule for this week. So much to do and so little time. I have to plan for a city-wide prayer and worship event, find the rest of my team for our Seder meal, finalize the drama part of the Good Friday service, prepare the lesson for Wednesday night's Youth Group, work with the senior pastor to plan Sunday's worship service, attend the elder meeting, lead one worship team rehearsal on Thursday and a second on Saturday evening, work with our stage-crew to begin the set prep for Easter and find time to celebrate a family birthday. To top it off I am beginning to feel like I might have adult ADD.

This weeks schedule scares me to death. I look at the week and do not see how I will be able to accomplish everything. I am scared of failing.

This past Sunday P.J. preached on Luke 10:38-42 a.k.a. the "Mary and Martha" passage. I was challenged by what he said. "The biggest enemy of intimacy with Jesus is business for Jesus". I am a pastor and I get paid to "do" ministry it is easy for me to get caught up with the business of ministry. Sometimes I do necessarily enjoy doing the things I do but they come with the job. There are times when I wish I could say no to certain things like "normal" people at our church can. There are times when I get frustrated because it seems like everyone is saying no and I am left holding the ball (notice I said "it seems"). It is times like these that I click into get 'er done mode and I know that I become Martha like and get so busy I forget to choose the better part. I also get so busy that I become jealous of those not helping and begin to complain about them (usually to myself and Jesus).

So why am I writing all of this down to post in cyber-space? It is because it helps me process through the situation. I know that very few, if any other people will ever see this or if they do happen to stumble across it, ever take time to read it. But on the off chance that someone else does happen to read it, maybe it is you who is reading this. I hope that somehow, if even in the tiniest way, it will help you and encourage you. I am also writing this because even in doing so I am realizing that even in the business of a hectic week, I can still choose the better part. I can still find time to steal away and sit at Jesus' feet to spend time with him soaking in all that he wants to teach me. I hope you will do the same

Peace
Todd

Dealing With Discouragement

Ok, so here it is Wednesday evening and I find myself wishing the week was already over. There is nothing huge that has happened to make me feel this way but rather a few seemingly small things. To begin with we had a great opportunity on Sunday morning. We had a guest worship leader in and she did a phenomonal job. As I looked around the sanctuary I saw people with hands raised, some were jumping (ever so slightly), and most were singing with all their might. It seemed as though people were enjoying it. In between the services though at least a half dozen people made it a point to let me know that either they thought it was too loud or that they did not like the style of music. Some were polite about it others were more brusk. I even received a note on our prayer request cards stating that the music that morning was more noise than music.

I think that I am a pretty stable person and one who doesn't need the accolades of man to feel like I am doing a good job yet I was kind of crushed. I walked away feeling like a dear friend had just rejected the gift I was so excited about giving him. I don't like feeling this way and I think I am now more frustrated with myself for feeling dissappointed that I didn't get the huge "thank-you's" and "that was awesome's". I guess after all, I still am relying to much on man for my worth. I know I need to keep my eyes on Christ and look to Him alone for my everything. As the great classic worship song goes, "Jesus, Lamb of God...you are my all in all."

With all this being said, would I do it again? Absolutely, you betcha!